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Pop Culture : Celebrities provide tangible lessons on love

 

Ah, that time of the year has come. The sea of orange we’re accustomed to seeing around campus is overtaken by a crimson tide, the price of flowers is marked up to an inordinately high amount without customer protest, and it’s instinctive to start any conversation — be it with friend or stranger — with one question: So, what are you doing for Valentine’s Day? 

Never mind that the subsequent response could either range from the jubilant (‘I’m going to an overpriced restaurant crowded with a hundred other couples suckered into celebrating this incredibly predictable holiday!’) to the somewhat depressing (‘I’m spending the night in my room with the lights off, listening to Coldplay on repeat and gorging on chocolate-covered pretzels while contemplating all the poor decisions I’ve made that led to me being alone at this very moment and quite possibly for the rest of my life!’)

Even if you’re in the latter category, perk up. The day’s about love, after all, and you don’t have to be attached to commemorate the L-word. Once you do decide to enter the dating foray, though, tread with caution and take notes from the sect of society that reflects the very best and worst of us, in love or otherwise: celebrity couples. 

 



1. Reese Witherspoon and Jim Toth — After Reese kicked her cheating pretty-boy of a first husband, Ryan Phillippe, to the curb, female fans around the world banded together in support of their A-list heroine and resolved to find her a more deserving beau. (Or at least anxiously scanned the pages of Us Weekly to see if she found one herself.) Along came talent agent Jim Toth, a hunky professional who understood her industry but wasn’t directly a part of it. Cue fireworks, proving the success of couples who come from different fields of work, canceling out competitive streaks and singular conversations at the dinner table.

 

2. Jake Gyllenhaal and Taylor Swift — With a penchant for blondes, Jake rebounded from Reese with a two-month long foray into the world of diary entries and repetitive chord structure when he dated country music star Taylor Swift. Alas, age turned out to be something other than a number, and they broke up because of the unbridgeable gap in their years. It’s difficult for people to come together from separate stages of life, especially if one party insists on chronicling her every heartbreak for massive teen consumption.

 

3. Ronnie and Sammi (from ‘Jersey Shore’) — If your relationship causes you and your significant other to do nothing but scream and fight and curse at each other and then stay in for the night to recover from the rage while your entire social circle is downing shots and getting ready for a good time, you’re probably in a bad relationship. If your friends tell you multiple times that you two do nothing but bring each other down and lay lifeless in bed, staring at the wall while television viewers across America feel the joy being sucked out of them with each passing second that you insist on doing this, you’re definitely in a bad relationship. If you’re Ronnie and Sammi, break up now and stay that way. Please.

 

4. Prince William and Kate Middleton — It’s nice to know that in a time when society craves instant gratification, true love sometimes does wait. Dubbed ‘Waity Katey’ by the British press, Kate Middleton dated her prince for eight years before he finally popped the question last October. Though they endured some highly publicized breakups, their love ultimately prevailed, and they’ll be bound in royal matrimony later this year. Of course, the promise of the crown jewels, living in a palace and having butlers on hand to fulfill her every need probably boosted Kate’s patience just a little bit. 

 

5. Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez — These young lovebirds have yet to make it official, lest those afflicted with Bieber Fever get worked up into a murderous delirium and cry for Gomez’s blood. Still, puppy love is the cutest, and these two seem annoyingly adorable together. Enjoy the giggles and shy glances while they last, new couple, before the petty arguments kick in about who has better hair. In this teenage pair, who knows how long one can go on for?

Sarah Lee is a senior magazine journalism major. Her column appears every Monday, and she can be reached at shlee10@syr.edu.





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