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Signs lined the stage and the pews in Hendricks Chapel on Wednesday night. Each was decorated with bright yellow stars, each containing an individual promise to work toward ending sexual and relationship violence at Syracuse University.

“I felt I did not have agency over my own body. I believed my body was infectious,” said Carla Guariglia, the founder and former president of Stand With Survivors SU who was the student speaker. “I didn’t want to be around anyone because of the immense shame that I carried. Everything changed for me when a friend of mine confided in me that she (had also) survived sexual assault.”

Six different speakers, including Guariglia who joined the event virtually, discussed practices to prevent domestic violence during Take Back the Night, a global protest held on college campuses during the month of March to raise awareness about preventing sexual and relationship violence. They also raised awareness about on- and off-campus resources available for survivors.

The keynote speaker of the night was Randi Bregman, the executive director of the Vera House. In her speech, Bregman said that the event was important as it helped provide survivors a space to discuss stopping domestic and sexual violence.

“I want to speak first to the victims and survivors in this space,” Bregman said. “You are not alone. I believe you. You deserve to be treated with honor, respect and human dignity. To know love and care without fear.”

Bregman also addressed those who may have committed harm themselves, in any capacity. She added that many different types of prejudice — including racism, sexism and ableism — overlap with domestic violence and are intersectional.

“We have all experienced hurt and harm. We have all caused harm to others,” Bregman said.

Bregman told The Daily Orange afterward that she does believe in holding people accountable for their actions, but doesn’t support shaming others. Sending people into a “shame spiral,” she said, doesn’t help to create change. Through working with Vera House since 1990, she’s seen many people come in with set beliefs, and grow for the better.

The Rev. Brian Konkol, the dean of Hendricks Chapel, led introductory remarks and started the night with a prayer. He stated that Take Back the Night could help draw attention to the “chasm” in our society caused by domestic violence and therefore allow the SU community to commit to getting rid of that gap.

The keynote speaker of the night was Randi Bregman, the executive director of the Vera House, said that the event was important as it helped provide survivors a space to discuss stopping domestic and sexual violence.
Wendy Wang | Staff Photographer

Other speakers included counselors and student peer leaders from the Barnes Center at The Arch. Each emphasized the resources the Barnes Center offers, including confidential counseling and trained critical response groups such as the Sexual and Relationship Violence Response Team, which they said is available 24/7 to aid students.

The speakers from the Barnes Center also emphasized a focus on setting healthy boundaries and consent, even in platonic relationships. Stepping back and creating open communication can improve a relationship and solve many issues, said one peer leader.

Guariglia spoke in a pre-recorded message from the U.K., where she is currently studying abroad. Her experience in a foreign country, she said, has helped her reflect and gain perspective on the movement.

“Survivor networks are a crucial part of the healing process in that, when connecting with other survivors, our minds are able to fully humanize our experiences, empathize with others and discuss methods for moving forward,” Guariglia said. “We need each other and we need to be there for one another, to uplift one another and to empower one another.”

Bregman primarily spoke about understanding intention versus impact. While you may not have intended to hurt someone else, she said, the impact of your actions is what comes first. Instead of running from your mistakes, addressing what happened and the impact it had on the other person is the best way to resolve conflict, she said.

After the speeches, about 30-40 attendees went outside and marched around campus with signs displaying phrases to raise awareness about domestic abuse. Chants such as “We have the power. We have the right, the streets are ours, let’s take back the night” echoed around campus.

After the event, students who attended, including Natalie Trerice and Rachel Katz, said they appreciated the relationship between a purely student-run organization such as SSWSU and the university. Although Guariglia is no longer the president of SSWSU, her involvement in the event felt like a bridge between the institution of SU and the student body.

Hearing from other students, they said, also helped the experience feel more relatable and allowed them to understand that they had a community backing them. While they came out to support their roommate, who participated in the presentation, the event was nonetheless important and educational, they added.

“It is important for victims and survivors to know that they are not alone, that there’s other people also going through the struggle,” Trerice said.

Bregman said that the relationship between the student organizations and the university was something she’d never experienced before. She felt it marked a change, as previously the relationship between the administration and the students was adversarial. While this tension still exists, she said, this event was a good step towards cooperation and change.

“What we saw with the student activism on campus this year is that they built a connection with the (administrative) leadership, and their voices were brought into (the conversation),” Bregman said. “We started to see the connection between the demands of (students) and what we needed to do on this campus to address them, and really this year things came together in a way I haven’t seen them come together before.”

Published on March 31, 2022 at 1:07 am

Contact Grace: gdkatz@syr.edu